Don't you just love Christmas?

not forgetting the Mid-Autumn Festival, and how about the National Day?


Well, all these festivals have one thing in common. They only happen once a year.


If you love these festivals, then you gotta love my blog. cause i only update it once a year too.



Welcome back, my fellow readers. First, I've like to apologise for my sudden disappearance which caused emptiness in many of you. I'm sorry.


Now, I'll try my very best to update every now and then, and I'll make sure it happens more often than Christmas. Cheers to that.


After coming back to Hong Kong last year on 30th August. I was actually looking forward to a brand new start.


But I was wrong.


I was homesick. That's a kinda confusing situation we have here. let me explain it to you.

HongKong is my homeland. Singapore is where i felt at home. So i'm back in my homeland but I'm not feeling at home and therefore, I was homesick.


I wouldn't say it was a hard year for me. In fact, I had it easy.

I was working at a tuition center, *cough call me tutor, as a part timer that only required to go to work on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

And for Tuesday and Thurday, I'm giving a total of 3 hours of private tuition to two students.


With so much free time in my hand, what did i do with them?


Of course, I was revising to prepare myself for University.



Any friends of mine would know that i am lying.

Of course I didn't revise. I was playing online game for whatever free time that I had. And I started dislike going out. Another reason is also because I don't really have any friends to go out with.

I guess I fell into depression for a period of time. But it ain't serious, it's just like Paris Hilton falling in love.



Every story needs a turning point, don't they?

Well, the turning point for me came around May/June this year. My contract with the tuition center is coming to an end. And because of my outstanding performance, they decided not to extend my contract.

Probably because I have one tattoo too many.


So i was jobless. And school-less.

GREAT! more time to concentrate on playing my online game.


Just as things and my body shape goes out of hand.
There comes a glimmer of hope.


I was surfing online looking for a job. That just showed how lazy I was, didn't even bothered to buy a newspaper to find a job.

And i stumbled upon the Three Stripes.


"Adidas Group Hong Kong is hiring the following positions: ...

Walk-in interviews on ..... time ..... "



Yup. again.

working in adidas in Singapore and working in adidas in Hong Kong, there are big differences.

Of course the most important difference is that in Singapore, we use the 4-letter word.

While in Hong Kong, we use the 3-letter word.




So i started working in retail again in July this year, and I was waiting for my university application.


By the end of August, all my applications got rejected.

I thought I didn't do that badly for my GCE 'A' Level.


Anyway, I applied for banking and accounting at ChuHai College, and i got accepted.


I thought Nanyang Technology Uni is gonna be the most 'Chinese-named' Uni that i'll go to.

I was wrong.



ChuHai. take that Nanyang.

When you were a little kid,

Have you ever dreamt of what you gonna be when you grow up?

I was chatting with my close friend recently. We talked about random stuff like the recent collapse of the stock market and about the chemical Melamine found in milk.

when you ask someone a question. you expect an answer and you don't question the answer again. that's rude.

and i will label you stupid for doing that.


i encountered four of them today. i shall be creative and name them stupid 1, stupid 2, stupid 3 and stupid 4 respectively.


usually if you encountered one of them a day while working, it's consider unlucky already. to encounter four of them in one day. i must be getting lucky. if you know what i mean.



scene 1: Stupid 1

s1: hello, this in-sole can use for the older version boot? (she's holding a newer model's in-sole)
suki: yea. can. it works both ways.
s1: (gave me a doubting look) sure?
suki: ....

at this very moment. i really want to say. if you don't believe me, why even ask me. but of course being in the retail line. customer always comes first.

really?


of course after she is so confident in doubting me, i started to doubt myself too. so i made an effort to call one of the most experienced staff and to confirm with him and i am right.

so i went back to her..

suki: yes m'am. i just double checked for you. and yes it works for the older version too.
s1: sure?
suki: hmm if you can't screw the studs in. you can go screw yourself. for that, i'm pretty sure it works.


of course i didn't say that to her. if not, i will pretty much out of job till school re-opens. call me hypocrite.




scene 2: Stupid 2

s2: hi, why is the black colour street soccer shoes on discount while the white one with the same design are not on discount?
suki: because the white colour one is a newer colour and the black one is past season item.
s2: serious? are you kidding me?
suki:...

hey dude. do i look like a fucking comedian? why do i want to tell you a joke, so that i can make your pretty girlfriend laugh?

after abit pissed off...

suki: i'm not kidding, it's really a newer colour that is why its not discounted.
s2: really? but i thought i saw it for many months already.
suki: *too irritated to reply so just look at him
s2: ah nvm nvm.

you mean as long as you see the item for many months, it have to be on discount? try telling that to SBS or SMART. i see them everyday too.



scene 3: Stupid 3
s3: excuse me. can i try this shoe?
suki: yea sure, what size can i get for you?
s3: (looking and pointing at his feet) my size.
suki:....


well, technically it's a correct answer. it's your size that i'm getting but please, i need a number damn it!

so i calmed myself down..

suki: err... nvm why not you try the display first then from there i guage for you.
s3: ah.. okok guage..




last but not least,

scene 4: Stupid 4

it was so stupid that i really forgotten about it. but it is along the line of the really? sure? responses.




damn.

this is really a sure way of getting someone irritated.


really?

i feel that blogging is like.. eating MacDonald.

you can eat them day after day, upsize, extra apple pie.
or once you stopped. you can stay away from Macddy for weeks or even months.


it's just like blogging. you can blog day after day with all these junks.
or once you stopped. you can stay away from blogging for weeks or even months.

and why am i repeating the second line. damn it.


anyway. i had Big Mac for my dinner and that explain this post.
cause like i said, blogging is like eating MacDonald.

and i don't know what's that line for.



ok. looking back at my posts. i think the blog address handphone and lighter is abit underrated. i feel it should be like handcuffs and lubricants. lets not get all excited now people.


perhaps, i should really write something decent for once. like talk about the politic.


ok politics. well, the only politician worth mentioning on this blog is none other than, yup u would have guessed it, Bill Clinton.



need no futher elaboration.


you know, back in secondary school days, my English teachers always emphasize the importance of having a thesis in your essays.

well if this is an essay. my English teachers will be so proud of me. i know i know.



thesis is overrated.


same goes for Big Macs. they are over-weighted.

tomorrow is vesak day. A public holiday!

happpy holiday everyone. but i'm working.

i guess there are many people out there are also working on Vesak day, and they must be thinking 'grr, why do i have to work on a public holiday?'

well being a very informative and insightful person, i will tell u why and how Vesak day come about and maybe that will make those are working tomorrow feels better.

Vesak is an annual holiday observed by practicing Buddhists and it is a public holiday in many Asian countries like Cambodia, Sri Lanka, Malaysia, Myanmar, Thailand, Singapore, Vietnam, Indonesian, Hong Kong and Taiwan.
Vesak is sometimes informally called 'Buddha's birthday'.

that's all. thanks to wikipedia to make me sound so intelligent.

so if you are working, and feeling sad because it's a public holiday, just tell yourself basically you are working on someone's birthday instead of a public holiday. in that way, i'm sure you will feel better.


for the past two to three weeks, there ain't much significant events happened in my life cause i've been busy with work. leaving house at 930 in the morning and reach home about 1115 at night and on my off days i just want to really rest and slack. rest and slack also spell as fat.

but anyway, since i've been working lately and neglected at updating my blog. i feel bad for people who read them regularly and goes 'grr, fucker never update'. yes i know i know, many of you are saying that, just that you all are in denial. So i decided i must update it before gonna work for another 3 days.


since the only thing that happened in my life right now is work. what else can i talk about right? as much as i want to talk about something educational like sex and drugs, it's just not appropriate on the eve of Vesak day.

so, i've been cracking my brain to think of the Top 3 coolest jobs in the world. coolest to me at least. and how i rank them are according to the fun factor, job satisfaction it reward you with, and of course ignoring the pay. Cause you know highly paid jobs are usually boring. i'm not saying being an engineer is boring.

let the countdown begin.

coolest job number 3: Male teacher in an all girl school

lets not get kinky here. the only other place where you can be equally happy with all the girls surrounding you are probably in the clubs but then again being an educational and responsible young man, school will be a better place. imparting your knowledge to your students not only in shaping them as who they will be as they grow up but also impressing them with your intelligent. you know how girls like intelligent guys.



of course if i have a textbook like this will be great.



















coolest job number 2: Male stripper at a bachelorette's party

not only it's a all girls party. but also you are stripping. and the ladies are screaming!
of course the best part will be when you finished stripping, you look at the ladies and say 'i'll give you all something to scream about later.'



coolest job number 1: handjob and blowjob

yup as you have guessed. the coolest job in the world. hairdresser i meant.





believe me.

back in secondary school days.

our teachers always encourage us to read more by forcing us to submit book reviews.
of course you are expected to read the whole book and write a review to the teacher and as if the teacher have read each and every book on earth that he/she will mark you either right or wrong for your review.

i bet many of you out there simply copied the summary at the back plus the first page of the book to complete the review. shame on you.

now i'll give you guys a proper book review. for the first time.

book title: Letters to Sam
author: Daniel Gottlieb

A grandfather's lessons on love, life, loss, and the gifts of life to his dearest grandson sam. sam is showing signs of autism when he's around 2 years old. of course that is gonna change his life forever. as a role of a loving grandfather, Daniel (Dan), started writing all these letters to sam since he's a baby. so when he grows up he can read all these letters his grandfather wrote for him even if Dan is not around. (kinda reminded of ps i love you)

there are so many beautiful and meaning lines in the book that i will recommend you guys to read it.

this book will teach you how to love, how to live your life, how to get back up on your feet when you falls down, and how to cherish you life. aww so meaningful.

what kind of lesson will you want to tell your grandson?

start living your life now.

end of review.





hmm now i know why i don't do well for my book reviews in secondary school days. p.s there is no summary at the back of the book. if not i'll have copied it.

yes, i can hear it as the boat is approaching Mersing from Tioman.



the sound keeps getting louder as the coach drove closer to JB from Mersing.


finally, after crossing the custom. i can hear and see them clearly.




yes, hot ladies in heels. woo.




i'm back. woo.





Clear blue sky.
Endless oceanic view.
Natural waterfall.
Exciting marine life.
Hot bikini babes by the beach that checks me out.




well, all but the last one.


the most important one. damn.


despite having all the environment you need to hook up with some girls, Tioman, is missing the babes. i'm definitely not trying to say that there aint any hot babes in programmers. but you know the phrase 'grass on the other sides are greener, babes from the other land are hotter.'




but shockingly disappointing that the only pussies i saw there are cats. and amazingly there ain't any bitches around!




three days in a place where there is no internet access is a torture.


the importance of checking my emails. yup don't think too much.




anyway, since there ain't any chances of me checking my emails so i decided to get some nice tan and just enjoy the peaceful atmosphere there.


but sadly, i'm not tan but red. i love man utd, but i don't really want to be red like them. i'm like a big blushing mushroom now.




let's talk something serious now after spending the previous few minutes typing rubbish.




Tioman is a great place to calm ourselves from our hectic lifestyle, to appreciate what we have and how fortunate we are to have them in our live. so everyone please go and hug your laptop, give a rub on the back of your toilet, and kiss every hot babe you see on the street.




of cuz different people have different definition of a hot babe.




mine would be one with a pair of big eyes,
who can wear a pair of harry potter glasses but still looks hotter than Claire Jedrek,
and still uses the 'sunflower pose' when taking picture in this 21st century.




you guys must be thinking, 'haiz, no more already lah!'


But!
you guys know what is siukee's middle name? it's ---> never disappoint.




i have a picture of someone just like that.












































isn't she hot?



kim, i'm afraid after this post, all the guys will kiss you when they see you on the street.



my bad.

'For your own safety, please stand behind the yellow line.'






Singaporeans definitely know how to follow rules.

but i can't hold back anymore.






this is really pissing me off.

days when i took train to city hall to go to work.

when i want to alight from the train.

this is what the exact scene.

you guys must be thankful that i don't have a camera.

if not i will surely take a picture of every-fuck-one of ur face.

and give you people a nice nickname before i edit it with paint.



ok.

you all just followed rules right.

'stand behind the yellow line' - checked

'stand behind the yellow line and blocked the fucking door' - checked

'stand behind the yellow line and blocked the fucking door and rush in the moment the door opens' - checked.





i tell myself i shall not tackle everyone who come rushing towards me.

because for one simple reason, they are not holding a rugby ball.



soon, you all will force me to bring them and put it in your hands,

and don't blame me for giving you people a lift tackle.





this really irritate me. you think by rushing in, you will get a seat?

sorry that you have to find out on my blog that, by the time the train reach city hall from boon lay, the seats are all taken.

common sense please.



even if there are seats, those standing in the train already will sit down 1st before you even get your ass in the train and after you got tackled by me. so what's the worth people?





since i'm always full of brilliant ideas, here are my advices to you people.

1. if you are going towards boon lay from city hall and you want a seat. take the train to changi. then bounce back. trust me if you don't have a seat. find me. i'll let you sit on me. only if you are hot. if not you can sit on the person next to me.



2. this idea goes out to SMRT. refer to diagram below













now you all will know how to stand behind the yellow line PROPERLY.




now WHERE'S MY SEAT?

chocolate milk, banana milk, strawberry milk. ever wonder how they are made?

well a stupid answer will be to squash some strawberries and mix them in the milk.

but my friend had a stupi... better answer. she thought that to get strawberry milk, just feed the cows with strawberries and milk them, and there you go! strawberry milk! i thought cows only eat grass, i didn't know they eat strawberries, banana, chocolate. lucky cow.

all the Marigold workers will be out of job.

and the funny thing is that she's not joking.

God bless your innocence. i meant ignorance.

i don't blame her. cause literature never teach her about strawberries, cows, or milk. Just like engineering never teach me about william shakespeare.

lol. still friends right.



for the past few days. i thought about alot of things.
especially where am i leading in life?
i'm not being emo. it's more like a reflection on myself and find the right path again. and my sister email me a passage from the book she read, 'happiness now' by Andrew Matthews. and there's one line in there i want to share with everyone who need some motivation now.


'take any goal you want to achieve, ... , and you will find a hundred reasons why it is inconvenient or impossible, but all you need is ONE really good reason why you want something! then you go and get it!'

thanks sis.

good teacher.


ok that's all. time to go eat some strawberries and hopefully it will be strawberry flavoured. if you know what i mean.